Avoid the Christmas Relationship Stress


Northern Beaches relationship expert and certified results coach Jürgen Schmechel, explains how to minimise relationship stress.

Did you know that Christmas is one of the most stressful times of the year for any couple? Everyone has high expectations, obligations, and an idea of how Christmas should ‘look’, but things don’t always go to plan. The gap between expectation and reality can cause you some real stress. Let’s look at what can add stress to relationships over Christmas and how to avoid it:

Not enough time for your kids.
You are so busy preparing everything for a perfect Christmas that you can’t even find the time to go to the beach with your kids. How about your Christmas is less perfect this year, and instead you enjoy the precious time with your children? They won’t care that a few candles are missing, or that the wrapping paper is not smooth - but they’ll remember the day at the beach.

Not enough sex.
You are hoping to find some time to revive your love-life, but your head is in overdrive. Unfinished preparations and endless chores are stopping you from relaxing. Don’t force it. Spend just two hours alone in nature and find your own balance first. The rest will come.

Not enough time for your parents.
Each year you have the discussion with your spouse about when to visit your parents and in-laws. It does not need to be all on the same day. If you spread it out from the 22nd till the 26th December, you have plenty of time to choose from and everyone is happy.

The right food.
It must be spectacular. It must be better and more plentiful than last year. Does it really? Who is judging? Make it simple; get the whole family involved and cook something together.

The right presents.
From October, the shopping malls are playing Christmas songs and offering the latest gadget as a “must-have” and you are in the midst of it all – not knowing what to buy and how much to spend. This year, gift an experience rather than a gadget no one really needs. A weekend of camping in the Hunter Valley, a day kayaking on Pittwater or… spending time with your loved ones. That’s the biggest gift you can give. 

Make the holiday season precious and don’t stress about the little things. Merry Christmas! •